Getting Started with Matchmaking

Hi, it’s Danielle, your friendly neighborhood matchmaker! Thank you for your interest in Tribe 12’s matchmaking initiative. Let me tell you a bit about it so you can see if it’s a good fit for you! If it is, you will be able to book a conversation directly with one of our matchmakers in the OK I’m in! section at the end of this page.

Who is matchmaking for?

People who are…

→ Dating in the Philly area (either living here or willing to date here)

→ In their 20s and 30s

→ Jew-ish in any way you personally define it

→ And by the way: any gender identity, any sexual orientation, any relationship structures! We are queer, gender, kink and poly affirming.

What is Tribe 12?

Tribe 12 is a donor-supported non-profit 501(c)(3) organization. Our mission is to connect people in their 20s/30s to Jewish life and community in Philadelphia today so they will choose to stay connected tomorrow. You’re on our website right now! We have about 150 events a year, everything from sports leagues to huge happy hours to a community for entrepreneurs.

Why does Tribe 12 have in-house matchmakers?

Danielle here with the history-on-one-foot: while in grad school, I watched my religious friends use traditional Jewish matchmaking to find love and thought, why can’t everyone have that kind of help and support? To explore that question, I completed my master’s thesis on trends in secular Jewish dating. I started Tribe 12’s matchmaking initiative in 2017 to put some of my findings into the real world and it grew organically into one of Tribe 12’s cornerstone programs. We have met with 800 singles (and counting…), hosted over 150 original events and facilitated over 50 serious relationships!

What happens after I connect with a matchmaker?

After one of our matchmakers get to know you, their goal is to give you access to our broad network of hundreds of people in their 20s and 30s who are dating in Philly’s Jewish community! Here are some ways that plays out:

→ Be your own matchmaker: Our recommendations and introductions to communities, organizations and events where you may meet like-minded people on your own

→ Invitations to rooms you should be in: Our public Tribe 12 events, series and opportunities which match your interests; plus private events which are by invitation only, with a guest list curated by our matchmakers to bring specific people together around something they have in common

→ Personal introductions: Connecting you directly with someone else that has met one-on-one with a matchmaker at Tribe 12

How much does it cost?

Since we’re a non-profit, we ask for a completely optional, one-time donation of $36 (which can be completed now, later or never at tribe12.org/donate) for keeping you in mind in this way. There is a Jewish tradition is to give your matchmaker a “gift” for a successful match – so if our connections result in you meeting someone great, we ask that you will consider giving a donation of any kind to Tribe 12 then, too. As a ballpark, $1,200 represents the traditional amount a couple might give for a successful match. With these donations, we can match the next couple and the one after that!

What’s the catch?

There is no catch! But there are plenty of things we like to be transparent about up front. The main one is that this suggested-donation-service we provide is pretty hands-off, especially compared to what a matchmaking firm or dating coach would offer. You might hear from us frequently, or in a random burst of communication, or not for a while, just depending on what is going on; or we might have a bunch of events all in a row, and then nothing for a while. Matchmaking is a constant experiment here at Tribe 12 and we are always working to improve our communication and offer as many opportunities as we can.

I want to be a matchmaker!!!

I know, right?! In March 2023, we trained our first apprentices in Tribe 12’s methodology and were thrilled to bring some new matchmakers on board through that program. If you’re interested in being trained as a matchmaker in the future, email danielle@tribe12.org.

What if I want more help than what you are offering?

While we still offer our signature free (with a suggested one-time donation of $36) matchmaking intake calls, we have had many people ask us for more hands-on matchmaking help — and we’re ready to deliver! Browse our new offerings here.

We also like to mention that one of our matchmakers, Michal Naisteter, is a date coach and matchmaker outside of her work with Tribe 12 and is happy to take on individual clients from our network. Michal generously gives a donation back to Tribe 12 for those referrals. Email Michal at michal@tribe12.org to discuss your individual needs!

I want to start this for my demographic / city / organization / religion / whatever!

We have just begun to help others start a similar Jewish matchmaking initiative in their communities because as far as we know, we’re one of a kind! Fill out this form to be informed of our upcoming training or set up a time to chat with Danielle if you want to explore the possibilities.

OK I’m in! How do I book a time with a matchmaker?

View the individual calendars of our in-house matchmakers below and set up a time to chat with whoever’s schedule fits yours best. All our matchmakers work closely together so regardless of who you have your intake call with, you will be plugged in to all our offerings! Please note that as of September 1, 2022, we discontinued the option to communicate with our matchmakers asynchronously via Whatsapp.

Video chat with Danielle (mornings)

Video chat with Michal (afternoons)

Video chat with Ross (evenings)

 

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